We are all searching for something. Every single one of us. Whether it is for connection and understanding, safety and comfort, or honest and true communion, we are all looking to find that place in our world where we feel safe enough to let our defenses down and finally exhale. We long for a haven where we can go when the weight of the world may be too much for us to handle. We may crave a place of comfort and love where we know we will not be judged for what we are feeling or the mistakes we’ve made. There is a need within us to seek out a group or community that will welcome us for simply who we are. When we find a person, trusted council or community that will accept us for who we are, we feel welcomed and accepted. It is only natural to want to seek out others who can share in the joys and pleasures we have in life as well as help us understand what is going on when we are down. We are human. We are social beings. However, there is more to our healing journey than working on our outer connections. If we are to truly heal and get to the root of our patterns, we need to also take time by ourselves to reflect. This is how we remember our stories. It is how we can give voice to what longs to be witnessed and spoken upon our hearts, minds, and bodies.
Our experiences and feelings are real. We long to be witnessed by other caring souls for healing to take place, especially during times of trauma or tragedy. But what about ourselves? We have the ability to offer love and comfort to ourselves within the shelter of our heart and soul. It is a winding path we walk. As we move between our darkness and light, we also move between outside help and the important work of digging deep within ourselves. There are many lessons we can learn from our past experiences. It is important to give ourselves the space we need along with unconditional love. When we are in this sacred space, we can let our guard down and allow the healing to begin without harsh judgement. It is imperative that we are as honest with ourselves so we can look upon our past with gentleness, care, and objectiveness. When we do so, we create a healthy environment for growth and transformation. But how can we do this? What are some tools we can use to reclaim our voice and tell our story?
Self-reflection is a powerful tool. It is the action we need to gently uncover the pieces of ourselves that have been hurt and shuttered away. This is the place where we can listen to what the memories of our experiences tell us. This is where we discover parts of our buried heart and soul. This is where we learn to love ourselves with gentle grace so we can hold what we may feel is broken and forgotten within us. This merciful offering, the gift to be silent and still, allows the space for deep healing. This is the process that sets us on the path of understanding and welcomes us back fully within our hearts. In this homecoming, we have the courage to slowly embrace the stories of our past and bring our lessons forward into the present with a caring heart and neutral eyes.
Journaling and meditation are also important methods of peeling back our layers to gain greater understanding of who we are and why we are the way we are. When we journal, we are giving our thoughts and experiences a safe place to speak. No one else will ever see what we write upon those pages. We are giving ourselves permission to release what has been bottled up inside us for so long. We are giving voice to our emotions by letting them flow from our heart and through our hand. Sometimes, a journal may be the first time a memory is spoken out loud. We are literally writing our own story; allowing something to come to life from our shadow. There is a liberation in this action. In that moment, a soul piece is witnessed, allowing us to breathe once again. Maybe we are breathing for the very first time. Partnering meditation with journaling, we take the next step of looking inward. Here we are creating a mindful, inner peace and calm that we can carry with us. However, that is only part of the goal. Meditation helps us to develop the skill of sitting with ourselves and all our parts, no matter what they are. It is the ability to gain an inner peace while we have a lot going on in our lives. It can help us to silence the ‘noise’ so we can dig deeper into our subconscious. Once we are there, we can discover information, heal, and transform ourselves with the lessons that we are unfolding. It is the communion we crave when we seek the wisdom of our soul.
As we work with the many tools we have, healthy boundaries are built when we learn the lessons from our past. They help us continue our healing work. When we say the things we need to say, we reinforce the lessons we have worked so hard to learn. Through healthy boundaries, strength is born. We know we have the power to speak our voice. We realized that we can advocate for ourselves. We have the power to bring into our lives what is needed and release what no longer serves us. As a result, we begin to untangle ourselves from old narratives either from others or ones that we created ourselves. These old patterns and stories were formed to protect us from the pain we were not ready to heal, further coloring our lens where we may not have been able to see the truth of a situation. This too, is a lifelong process and a skill that is crucial in our mental, emotional, and spiritual development.
It is true that healing is not an easy process. However, honest and diligent work can set us on a course that is transformative on the inside as well as the outside. As we give ourselves the permission to recognize what has happened in our lives, we begin to bring a bit of our light into our own darkness. We begin to see ourselves in a different perspective and learn to love ourselves in the process. With our tools, we can make beneficial choices and reclaim our voice for ourselves. The more we do this, it can become easier to create a space to listen to ourselves and foster the voice we’ve always had. The stories we tell ourselves are the stories that make up our lives. Don’t you think that you have the right to speak the truth of your own story? You are the one who experienced life through your perspective. You are the only one who can truly understand what is being spoken in your heart and soul. Don’t you think that you deserve to understand your own story and write your own future?
Be well,
Renee Bedard ~ The Whispering Crow
The Whispering Crow 